Our beautiful county is well known across the country for having the best beach destinations.

Thousands of vacationers will flock to our coastal towns for their summer stays as we hopefully emerge from the pandemic.

But that same enthusiasm isn’t always shared by the people who actually live in these places, who weren’t so enamored with the range of attractions we offer.

Much of that frustration with the place they call home has been evacuated on the ILiveHere site.

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ILiveHere is a website where local residents carry out brutal digs and sweeps in their hometown – all in the name of satire.

Almost every town from West Kent to East Kent has at least one scathing review.


The A259 in Dymchurch, near a historic Martello Tower

How the resident described it: “Dymchurch aka Grimchurch”

“Awful young people, awful schools, rain 24/7 and when there is no penis”

“As a youngster who grew up in this geriatric landfill, I can tell any young family that is looking to move here, just don’t do it.

What it really looks like: Anyone who spent time in Kent as a kid will tell you about Romney Hythe and Dymchurch – it’s really a lot of fun.

The region receives a lot of tourists in the summer, but like most of Kent’s coastal towns, these tourists help keep businesses open and create a buzz in the city.

It’s a typical British seaside town and much nicer than this resident claims.

Herne Bay

Sunset over Herne Bay

How the resident described it: “The city can offer free spontaneous combat sessions between 9 p.m. and 4 a.m. on weekends and in most venues on weekdays before midnight.

“It’s the only place you can be sure to bury your head, far from the successes of the rest of the world.”

“And if you say hello to someone at breakfast, you assaulted them at dinner.”

What it really looks like: I’m not sure what part of Herne Bay this resident lives in, but it can’t be the same I’ve seen.

The pier is one of the most famous in Kent and supported by a pretty promenade, the Herne Bay waterfront is a place where you can take the whole family.

With the reversing towers just a mile down the road, it’s a popular spot for tourists who love to visit the area – despite what the resident says. The niche shops on the main street give the city a very personal feel.


The foxes were found on Bogshole Lane in Whitstable
Whitstable coast from above

How the resident described it: “With pubs and unnecessary little shops scattered all over the narrow, fish-smelling street; this city is a treat.

“Why don’t you come to Whitstable to get drunk, smell fish, and almost participate in 5 fights because you farted?” Great little town!

“It’s easier to get some form of drug here than it is to eat something. Why are you asking? Because most stores close around 9 a.m., and on a Sunday it’s pretty medieval. “

What it really looks like: Whitstable has earned a reputation as one of the trendiest towns outside of London.

“With its magnificent seaside bars and quintessential shops, it appeals to all ages

“Pubs and restaurants make it popular in the summer and with good transport links it truly is one of Kent’s hot spots.”


Margate is popular with tourists

How the resident described it: “Thanet has been successful in attracting the lion’s share of the country’s unemployed, whether they are in training, aspiring or full-fledged.

“You would be advised to avoid being in public during the afternoon and at dusk, as these seem to be the natural gathering times for them.

What it really looks like: Thanet is home to magnificent beaches stretching over much of its coastline.

With Michelin-starred restaurants and plenty of activities for the kids, this is one of the most popular areas in the county.

The Turner Center, Dreamland, Folk Week and the UK’s biggest Wetherspoons mean there’s always something going on in the east of the county.

What is this person talking about?


Stroll along the White Cliffs of Dover

How the resident described it: “Open drug trafficking is normally expected in Dover. Crack and smack is easier to find than a good restaurant ”

“All the pleasant places to walk or enjoy as we have done in the past, are [allegedly] carried away by the English heritage.

The Down From London (DFL) crowd is just as bad with the letters from the lawyers on loud sheep, chickens and cows. A fox was shot, a policeman was called in and now they are making local history based on their ideas.

What it really looks like: This resident clearly woke up on the wrong side of the bed that morning.

Dover is full of very quaint micro-pubs and plenty of cafes in the city.

The White Cliffs and Dover Castle make it a popular destination with tourists and locals alike.


Sheerness is one of Sheppey's best known beaches.
Sheerness is one of Sheppey’s best known beaches.

How the resident described it: “If you don’t have a car and want to get out of your home and return to the mainland, the majesty of one of the world’s great train journeys awaits.

“The air is now clean and the only smell is McDonalds and despair.”

“Sheerness is the end of the line… literally. The end of a small branch line connecting Sittingbourne to Isle of Dirt. “

What it really looks like: Despite her criticisms, Sheerness actually has a lot to offer.

The island has plenty of areas with stunning views and a waterfront to die for.

The high street offers a wide range of items for shoppers and has a lot of life in it.

Sheerness is struggling, we think it’s unfair.

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